Far gone, Victor s POV
by CheshireFox997
Summary: He was an idiot, a coward. Now he was facing the consequences. (FEM Yuuri) Please review.


Authors note.

Heyyy, i didn't expect for anyone to like my first story, and so when i saw the review from animagirl i decided to keep on writing. It was actually the first time i wrote anything so im grateful for the comments, as i didn't expect anyone to like it.

Please review, i appreciate all opinions, im not very good with my english so please correct any mistake i make.

Now on with the story. :)

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He was an idiot, he left her al alone when she needed him, just as much as he needed her. He was a coward, too afraid to look at her in the eyes and tell her that it was his fault and that everything would be okay.

Because of his failure he no longer was a confident person, his mistakes took too much of both of them, their money, their time, everything. They were both tired of it all and he didn't knew what to do next, and he couldn't talk about it to her, he was too ashamed to even look ate her in the eyes. Ohh don´t get him wrong, he knew she would never blame him, but it only made it worse, having all of her trust and not being able to live up to her expectations, it hurt so very badly.

That night, after watching her sleep for a bit, he left, leaving behind only a miserable note. He ignored every attempt she made to talk to him, every call, every mail, every message, everything. He disappeared from the life of everyone that knew them, and didn't even try to know what happened to them after.

He wasted 15 years of his life running away, going from place to place, never spending too much time in any of them, afraid that someone would find him and make him go back and face his mistakes. He was just a coward, running with his tail between his legs, fearing the moment when they would find him and be confronted by the people he knew.

In those years he took various jobs, always staying hidden, never attracting too much attention, avoiding lots of people, just so he didn't have to face them. It worked, he made himself invisible for 15 years, but something told him that it was time to go back, that something big was happening, something important to him.

He has been having this feeling for the longest time, but always ignored it, put it in the back of his mind and continued on. But this was very different, and that had him worried. What could be so important?

So he came back, ignoring his fears for once, and what he found was something he never expected. He had a daughter, a 15 year old daughter, and she was mad at him.

He could not blame anyone but himself for not knowing, he did ignore all attempts of communication after all, and now he regretted it. He lost the chance to see his daughter grow into the woman he saw that day, and couldn't believe he wasted so much time.

He tried to get to know her, but he didn't blame her when she didn't even look at him. He was a stranger in his life, a stranger that hurt her mother deeply….

YUURI!, where was she?, why no one even mentioned her in front of him?… well that is a stupid question, but he needed to see her, to tell her why he left, to find out why he had that awful feeling in the pit of his stomach.

Not one person would tell him where she was, no matter how much he asked and begged on his knees for an answer, so he took thing in his own hands, and followed his daughter, hoping to find at least one clue of where she was. He wondered if she found someone else to love her, to care for her, he wondered if she was happy in the arms of other men, if she still looked as beautiful as he remembered her.

He followed her discreetly for a whole day, and as he saw her enter the hospital he though about going home for the day and continue following her the day after, but something stopped him, the same feeling he had when he decided to go back, and he decided to go inside, hoping that his suppositions where wrong.

He saw his daughter enter a room, and the name in the door almost made him doubled in pain, "Yuuri Katsuki".

Why was she here?, what happened?, oh god he just wanted to enter that room and find out, but he waited for his daughter to go home, so he could talk to Yuuri alone.

He waited for almost three hours and he sneaked into the room. What he saw broke his heart in a million pieces. His beloved looked so sick, she was so pale, her once shining jet black hair was messy and had lost all of it shine, her eyes, while surprised, looked so tired, and her lips, once a pretty pink, were now pale and dry.

-"Victor…"- she said with a weak voice, at this point he just wanted to sit in a corner and cry.

-" I-I didn't think i would ever see you again…"- tears started to stream down her face, and a little smile appeared on her lips. How could she smile at him like that? after everything?

-" I didn't think i would have ever come back.."- i whispered, and by her expression he knew it was not the best thing to say right now.

-"oh… why are you here then?"

-" NO! thats not what i meant. I´m so sorry Yuuri"- at this point tears where also streaming down my face- "I´m so sorry, i didn't want all of this to happened"

-"hey… it okay, you don´t need to cry Victor"

-" I was a coward, i ran away because i couldn't face you, and now i can´t help but feel like i´m a complete idiot, i should never have gone, i should have talked to you instead of only thinking of me. I´m such an idiot, god..."- i ranted, and she just listened to everything i had to say, just like she did years ago.

-" i never blamed you Victor, i always knew there was a possibility of everything going downhill and even then i decided to take the chance because being with you always made me feel so brave"

-" I messed it up and i hurt you in the process, how can you be so kind to me? after everything I've done?"

-" You have always been someone i admired, not because i thought you were perfect, but because i knew you would work to make everything better in the end"- that made me feel like shit.

-" I never had in mind what i would have a done if we were successful in our respective jobs, i just wanted to be with you, whatever the circumstances. I loved you, and i know i still do to this day."- i could only look at her with my mouth open, completely surprised.

-" I cant say that it didn't hurt when you leaved, and i don´t know if you still love me back. I´m not even sure if i know you anymore. But i know that i will never regret anything that happened because it led me to meet you, to love you and to have a beautiful baby, product of our love."

In that moment y couldn't help but hug her tight, and while i felt how thin and fragile she was, i could also feel the familiar warmth only she could gave him.

-" I never stopped loving you, and i want to get to know you again, i want to have your forgiveness and to get to know our daughter."- She just smiled.

He could see she was tired, but when he told her to rest, she told him she wanted to keep talking to him, so he did.

They spent hours talking, until she could not keep her eyes open anymore. He stayed there watching her sleep like all those years ago, but this time he didn't leave.

They spent days talking to each other, falling in love all over again. He talked to his daughter, and eventually received her forgiveness, their interaction was a little awkward at first, but they kept working at it until they could be father and daughter at last.

It had already been three months, and they both were at Yuuri´s room, she has been getting worse and worse, he now knew she had leukemia, that cursed disease was taking her beloved away from him, and there was nothing he could do more than wait and pray for her to get better.

That day father and daughter decided to stay with her for the night, and fell asleep in the little sofa of the room.

They woke up hours latter, to the screams of the nurses and doctors, and what he saw made his heart stop. He could no longer hear anything, or feel anything, he could only stare at her face, it looked as if she was sleeping with a cute little smile on her face, but he knew that wasn't the case and he couldn't do anything more than scream.

He and his daughter spent hours calling for her, begging her to open her eyes, begging the doctor to bring her back, praying for god to not take her away from them. But nothing worked, she was gone, and it destroyed them.

It had been a couple of days, and he still cried every night, hoping it was only a bad dream, that he would wake up and she would be there, drying his tears as he tells her of the horrible nightmare. But it didn't happened.

The only thing they could do at this point was to make sure she had a beautiful funeral, and that they keep on with their life as they knew she wanted. But they knew that for the years to come, they would always feel her absence, they will always miss her warmth, her happiness.

He dreamed everyday of a different outcome, of what it could have been. And everyday he would wake up crying. He took responsibility of their daughter, of their business, and every night, before he falls asleep, he hopes he could dream with her, and prays for one day, maybe in another life, he could spend his days with her.

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Love it? Hate it? just curious.


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